Tuesday, July 23, 2024

BIG Chuckle

An exciting new game for the entire family – Trick or Treat!

Let's play another game. Last week's game "Fact or Fiction" was a big hit, generating constructive discussion of critical issues among many people in various regions. In the spirit of Halloween, today's game will be called "Trick or Treat". Rules of the game: If you have been TRICKed into believing any of the following statements, please comment below, and I will TREAT you to cogent analysis, supported with verifiable data and logical interpretation on that topic. The tricks: 1. A...

LOGIC: proprietary solution kills trolls dead

Over the last 2.5 years, my team of scientists and I have been working diligently to come up with a product to get rid of those pesky trolls that have been littering our social media feeds. Well, I am proud to announce, we have devised a concoction that will exterminate those annoying pests. In Stage 1 and Stage 2 clinical trials, our solution has been 100% effective in making trolls disappear. Simply spray the trolls with our...

I might as well admit it – I am a speciesist

My niece recently commented that we should not consider ourselves superior to other animals. I immediately imagined the kitchen in which we were sitting being on fire, and me being able to only save her or my cat, Dash. My hunch was that she would want to be considered the “superior” choice, but we moved on to other topics and I lost my chance to confirm that with her (I will go with my...

Flight of fancy — taking the ‘class’ out of business class

As a father of 7 in the media industry (but, sigh, not Google, Meta, or Amazon), I do not fly on airplanes often. And when I do, it is generally the randomly chosen middle seat — perfect for my long legs — in row 32. However, last week, through a stroke of luck and a very generous person, I was given the opportunity to fly business class. What a treat! My opulent experience started well before...

Masks? Hell, no!

Remember the 1970s? Okay, maybe you are too young. How about the 1980s? 1990s? Early 2000s? I ask because back in the 1970s, or any one of the decades to follow, starting in the fall, and continuing into winter, a lot of people got colds. Some got the flu. I remember one difficult week in November of 2014 when both of my sons were home for five days straight, refusing homemade carrot soup at the...

Is it remote work or (not) remotely working?

Now that Zoom – the company that started it all – has folded its hand on the remote-work gamble, requiring its employees to return to the office, it feels like the party is over. We are three years into the work-from-home experiment thrust upon us by government-imposed lockdowns, and you would think from the posts dominating my social media feed that the work-life balance has never been better. “No more commuting!” “More time with my kids!” “Look at...

The moving story of woman versus machine

At 3 p.m. on June 30, my phone rang. Driving east on Highway 401 from Burlington to Cornwall, Ontario, Canada, and now somewhere west of Kingston, I was on a five-and-a-half-hour ride in the middle of a heat wave to pick up a U-Haul van, leave my own car in the parking lot overnight, and continue another hour to Montreal to help my son get through every Quebec renter’s nightmare; Quebec Moving Day. Deciding...

Naked in the desert

You know you have left your vacation planning late when the only accommodation available is a nudist colony. “Okay,” my sister, Heather, sighed into the phone. “I might have something for our first night.” Heather and I had just spent 20 soul-crushing minutes trying to find separate nights’ accommodation for an epic road trip that would start in Vegas, tour five of California’s national parks, and end back on the Vegas Strip a week later. We...

Top 10 Signs You Are Working with the Wrong Realtor

Many prospective and current homeowners are familiar with the best qualities of real estate agents – for example, physically attractive and fun. However, I think it is more important to identify bad realtors so you can avoid working with them. Therefore, I spent dozens of minutes researching and compiling the Top 10 Signs You Are Working with the Wrong Realtor: (Out of respect for our more sensitive readers, I will alternate pronouns between all of the genders.)   She...

Pouring cold water on latest health craze

Millions of people around the world are following the lead of Wim Hof, also known as the Iceman, in subjecting their bodies to extreme cold with intent to shock their bodies into better health. Well, I say Bah Hofbug! Cool your jets for a moment while I pour cold water on your every Wim. Did you know that the aforementioned Dutch dude has an identical brother who does not torture himself in ice and cold water, and has been found...