Monday, January 24, 2022

BIG Media Labs announces latest game-changing invention

While working with my team at BIG Media Labs in developing an anti-aphrodisiac that succeeded in helping me focus on work on Valentine’s Day, we stumbled upon a product that could be a game changer in the male sexual enhancement realm.

Our merchandise is expensive to manufacture, so I am looking for two very affluent business leaders to invest.

The product is shaped like and performs like a rocket, and it is powered by batteries, so if anyone knows of a super-wealthy person known for building rockets who has demonstrated proficiency in producing battery-powered vehicles, please provide the name to me in confidence.

We also need a famous, wealthy business leader who is familiar with the challenges of (either or both) Micro…Soft. It would be a bonus if the person has a fascination with having things injected in people. Please let me know ASAP if you can think of anyone who fits the bill.

There is only one thing left to do besides the formality that is convincing two of the most powerful people in the world to invest in my innovative business model; I need a catchy name that signals the function of my potent product while honouring my partners.

Hmmm … OK, I think I’ve got it: ElonGates.

Rob Driscoll
Rob Driscoll is co-founder and president of BIG Media Ltd. He is a writer and entrepreneur who is deeply committed to elevating the level of coverage of our society's most pressing matters as well as the level of respect in public discourse.

BIG Wrap

Pursuit of Alzheimer’s treatment has been misguided, study suggests

In her latest research paper, published in the Journal of Molecular Neuroscience, Anne Robinson, head of Carnegie Mellon's Department of Chemical Engineering, explains why understanding...

Netflix stock plunges as concern over subscriber growth rises

Netflix delivered its latest quarter of disappointing subscriber growth during the final three months of last year, a trend that management foresees continuing into...